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Wednesday, September 13, 2006

New Lingo for the War On Terror (TM)

We're making so much progress on so many fronts in the worldwide War on Terror (TM) that it is often difficult to keep up with all of the new inventive terminology being used to report on our progress.

No proud backer of the War On Terror (TM) wants to experience that awkward feeling at a local PNAC or Republican fundraiser when someone uses a really cool new term from the war (while discussing how quickly we'll recoup the cost of the Iraq war from a grateful Iraqi populace throwing us billions in oil revenue, no doubt) and not know the meaning of the term. Here's an introduction to a new term being bantered about by the "in-crowd" (as in "stuck in Iraq").

ESM -- execution style murders

So many cases have come up where scores of tortured, murdered bodies (20, 40, 60+ at a time) are being found throughout the country of Iraq in the past few months that the newness has worn off. Instead of a one-page note at the top of the daily briefing about the latest horror, this new category of horror has joined a collection of other horrors which have been sanitized and converted into alphabet soup for more friendly-sounding, crisp communication. Apparently "execution style murders" was taking up too much horizontal space in the Excel spreadsheet used to track our progress.

The frequency of execution style murders is leading many to conclude that the government has already reached the point where it cannot control the levers of government, including police and security forces. We are two months into the six month interval cited by Iraq's ambassador that would be the make or break proof if the Iraqi government could stand up on its own. It's becoming clear the answer is firmly headed in the NO direction.

Don't be left out! Update your personal copy of the War-Mongerer's Dictionary now with this great new term. If you need a little alphabetic help, the new entry for ESM goes between the entries for CINC and SNAFU.